Squishable Hamburger Standard

Squishable Hamburger StandardOh Hamburger, what is it about you that makes me want to ask, "I can has?" Is it the beef itself, savory and juicy? Or the condiments like a rainbow of squishy flavor? Or the gooey cheese hugging the patty like an old friend (and does that technically make it a cheeseburger?) "Yes I can has" indeed! There are cow burgers and soy burgers and ramen burgers and rice burgers, and burgers that are made from mushrooms why not a burger made of fur! Hold your

" Belly up to the bar and find a big maki to pour your sake

but its nocturnal eye benefits have been slightly (completely) exaggerated

don't reach for some kind of "nuts-based" metaphor or "loose screws" verbal device

The Hot Dog you know and love from a hundred blissful summer cookouts and sun-dappled baseball games is a symbol of Americana

Unicorns are sweet

A barrel roll

5(d) x 14(h) inches

Like taking a perfect ballet performance and adding puppets

" Okay fine

and they are very dissimilar to apples

Bananas grow upside down and they bend toward the sun

Ice cream on a tall freezer shelf at dinner (yes I'm having ice cream for dinner)